| Saturday, December 26th, 2009 |
freewriters
[ apocalypticaura ]
|
6:55p |
confessions of a christian.......
"A Word with Him” “The Heavenly embodiment of all our fears, our hopes, our dreams; what we all have inside of ourselves all along, but needed something to blame it on; Which makes you perfect. This perfection is what we love. Thus, we love you… or what we’ve made you.” So… One day I looked into the mirror as opposed to getting on my knees, to have a word with this almighty being or, “God,” if you please. I had somewhat of a bone to pick, ya know, some things that had been buggin’ me about some questions I had before but the answers were taking an eternity. You know…. Questions like: “God, are you real?” And, “How do I know?” Because, I had always thought that: Real, was defined as what you can touch, what you can feel, what you can see, smell and taste, But I have yet to see your face, and, is it you that is my conscience or do I think con-science? Which means with understanding, better known as logic. Not to say that you’re not real, But I can’t say that you’re not fake, Because if everything is the way it seems, Then it seems that all you do is take, and, There are enough people to do that. They take your time, they take your money, Even your life and it ain’t funny how, People dedicate their lives to blind trust and faith to someone or thing that promises everlasting love and grace, no matter what race, or gender, they, spend their, entire lives thinkin’ your so-called “blessings” ain’t lies, and your gifts ain’t curses. But their family rides in hearses one by one and … what do they get? Everlasting life. Current Mood:  contemplative |
freewriters
[ dark_lai ]
|
4:35p |
I can never understand you Should I even try? I never realized how much I was wrong… Did I make some mistakes? Did I know what to do? Should have I persisted… Now I’m alone… I’m looking for reasons to go on But you’re not helping me I silently wonder if your there If you are Why haven’t you come? I ask all these questions but no reply What the hell is going on? I wish I had someone to tell me all these things What could can I do? |
| Sunday, December 27th, 2009 |
freewriters
[ exhileration_x ]
|
3:13a |
Unsuccessful.
Rejected.
You just aren't enough.
Constant disappointment
is far more than rough. Just waiting
and waiting
For him to do SOMETHING.
So nonchalant & unaware
of what happiness he brings.
That boy with average grades
and an average face,
yet to this one girl, his arms -
are her favourite place. A year filled with pain,
Don't make me do it again...
All my hopes are on you,
2010. |
| Friday, December 25th, 2009 |
freewriters
[ s3ld0n ]
|
2:55p |
The Last Bottle (part II)
At that moment, Lee showed up. I always thought that Lee looked more like a Tom than a Lee. He was tall, his head was shaved, he was large—overweight I think, actually, although I would never say that because he’s so sensitive about things like that (although his nonchalance makes it seem like he isn’t)—and yet somehow looked like he was nine years old. Maybe it was the way he dressed that made him look that way. Anyway, he should have come off as intimidating, given his god-given bodily figure. Instead, he came off as very nice and very sociable but somewhat insecure. You could tell he was kind of insecure because of his humor, which was self-deprecating without being dark. Sometimes he would make jokes about being ugly. Personally, although I swear I don’t subscribe to any stupid universal-love-like beliefs, I find it easy to find things beautiful that are not, really, classically beautiful. Even those things that someone like me might, every once in a while, in a conversation, forgetting for a moment that I can find beauty in everything, say is “the kind of ugly that just can’t be beautiful,” or “really profoundly mundane, so that it just can’t be beautiful,” or “like a scrap of white plastic, like, plastic all the way from the 70’s, sitting on a granite counter, and maybe from being beaten up it has a couple of grooves in it filled with dirt. But the contrived contrast between the plastic and the granite makes it impossible for the situation to be beautiful.” The reason I let you in on that fact about me is that I want to tell you that I didn’t find Lee ugly. Lots of people would reassure him that he was not ugly, but I really meant it. They didn’t. ( Read more... ) |
freewriters
[ seasaltmind ]
|
1:38a |
there is so much i can share to show you that i care but with all these eyes on you on me i don't understand how you could ever really see... |
| Thursday, December 24th, 2009 |
freewriters
[ xiao_tsubasa ]
|
11:30p |
Merry Christmas everyone! I really wanted to post a christmas-y story, but I couldn't make one up in time.... so have this polish folkdance one instead. [some info might be false as I had only 10 minutes of research before winging it.] ---------------------------------------- - Mazurka It's a unusually hot day for a May in Warsaw but she doesn't mind. She scouts out a nice spot in a public park and we settle down. The music is set up, the stage I made out of scrap materials is placed nicely where anyone can see. The cameras are set and I click play. Rushing to my spot behind the black camera, I wink at her- our signal to start. She winks back in that seductive way of hers and she smiles at the small crowd just beginning to form. She calls out a friendly greeting to the boys and girls pushing to the very front and they giggle shyly. The show is about to begin. She starts with an old folk dance- the Mazurka. It's a couple's dance. But I'm not the one dancing next to her. She takes a young boy from the bustling crowd. The lively tempo whisks her away to a place where no one can reach her but the music. Her skirts swish and flutter and I am captivated. Every movement she does holds me in a enchantment I cannot break free from. My eyes never tear away from her, Not even for a second. Her hands are so graceful in the air and her feet step like lightning against the green grass.
We go through a couple pieces by Chopin as others cheer and some even join in a little. Those who know how to follow along that is. I laugh and for a moment I think I caught her eye.... Or perhaps it's just my wishful thinking.
Our last song is by Debussy and she twirls and twirls. Jumps and leaps. It ends with a slow bow and applause from our crowd. Her excited, bright eyes thank the crowd and I clap from where I am... wondering if she can see me, or if I'm just a simple spectator to her dance.
The crowd separates and we clean up. She talks and she shines with a glow that makes me want to glow with her.
"You have to be my partner next time! Dance with me, please?"
My heart trills and does a dance of it's own.... but how could I ever shine as brightly as she does? To be the person that supports her from the crowd is good enough for me. And when the performance ends, I'll be by her side. Even Forever if I had to.
"Sure."
With her in that flowing red skirt, we'll dance the night away in the great Phoenix City. |
freewriters
[ invigorating17 ]
|
3:45p |
My fingers were slipping down your spine As if they were doing the warm-up for a piano play Your heart beat strong, you said you were all mine And deep inside I felt that you would stay With me this night, Until the sun will rise again You did forgot your pride You said we were no longer friends I’ve got the confidence To take you to the stars With zero tolerance You’ve been caressing all my scars |
freewriters
[ scatchblack ]
|
4:06a |
brave little battered and bile drips the acid off her lips wipe on sleeve and then kiss |
| Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009 |
freewriters
[ brokentiger ]
|
9:55p |
I'm A Disaster
I can't sing In the right key I can't play Guitar by ear I'm a disaster Wearing a smile Trying not to cry Each time I fall Each time I fail Because everything gets harder Everyday ... I can't sing In the right key I can't play Guitar by ear I'm a disaster At least That's what theyMake me believe |
| Thursday, December 24th, 2009 |
freewriters
[ mymanicmymalice ]
|
1:35a |
Seal the Deal
I search for you in chat rooms I search for you in books I search within my dreams and then within the nooks and crooks. And every time I find you The reason fades away I get sick and tired and restless One quick fumble in the hay And then I’m gone, I’ve come We’ve screwed we’re through But the longing it remains I search for love not you Each time I swear upon My crumbling soul this time it’s pure Its simple they’re the one I’m totally, definitely sure Each time another pound of flesh So familiar, so foreign, so real For me to lick and love and fuck Ourselves over that’s the deal |
| Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009 |
freewriters
[ jannaboo ]
|
3:22p |
|
freewriters
[ your_efling ]
|
10:37p |
Climb aboard, sweet Courtney, We’re just about to set sail. The anchor’s raised, the engine roars Eager to take you to foreign shores. I hope the voyage is long, but pleasant A little unlike the time we shared. Soon you’ll be gone, and I’ll be without, Pregnant with disillusion and hopped up on doubt. Courtney, you sly little fiend. You hoodwinked me and butchered my ego. Sophia told me this too shall pass. And I’ll soon let go of the things I’ve amassed. You won’t even need a lifeboat for this trip. This baby’s on autopilot, slicing the ocean. Don’t carry a map, don’t stress, don’t fear, Travel every inch of this world, but never return here. Courtney you held my hand and put on some blinkers. And conned me into voting for you. A secret smile starts to take over my face, Knowing you’ll never come back to this place. |
freewriters
[ invigorating17 ]
|
5:25p |
You taught me what it was to love What was the real passion when the sunset came You showed how it felt when a tender kiss was not enough Your hands and lips were playing the exciting game And it was funny to repent Of all the crazy things that we had done To feel how our happiness was coming to an end To realize that I have missed the only one. |
freewriters
[ alyshiasilva ]
|
3:01a |
'Til The Light
I've realized there are gaps Between you and I My feet are cold I want you to wrap them with your feet To show how Our bodies perfectly merge When we lie beside each other At night I've found the gaps Your feet don't touch mine Current Music: Regina Spektor - Samson | Powered by Last.fm |
freewriters
[ scatchblack ]
|
2:03a |
little tea cup paw prints and my wrists are just to small to make the band fit what's the matter if it fits or doesn't fit what is the difference little girl wears big shoes dances on her tip tip tippest tip toes twirls around the coffee table claps her hands and has some cake and combs her hair and watches mommy do the dishes turns up volume on the tv falls asleep in daddy's arm chair goodnight morning sweet pea sundays |
freewriters
[ seasaltmind ]
|
1:35a |
I enter a home unlike any home. It is full of hate and combs and stars. There is a doe on the table. Her chest ripped open and stuffed with letters that were never mailed. I don't know what to think upon seeing this. I look away and cry. I choke on my vomit and crawl on the floor. Insanity has stricken my blind eyes. My third eye is unopened- sealed. No god can save me from this feeling. From this silent shock. I drown in my own shit. This is how I go. |
| Monday, December 21st, 2009 |
freewriters
[ unknownwreckage ]
|
10:05p |
sisters before misters
last night was amazing she thinks i stabbed her in the back im not losing you again she hates me no doubt the girl code did not occur she says i love you i loved you first she says good bye forever so much drama for this day she wants me to burn in hell i still love you and it shall not fade she says good bye and oh well i wanted to cry she was i told some lies she doesnt love me, who does? my best friends say they do i think you do mom does dad, unfortunately, does this has been the best day even if i lost her along the way i dont know what's gonna happen next but i hope its with you and no one else Current Mood:  loved |
freewriters
[ unknownwreckage ]
|
9:54p |
smoking
2 puffs light headed half gone i cant stand all gone im gonna puke i callapsed you help me walk home i hold on to my stomach my mind keeps wondering i hate this we get to my house i eat to calm my stomach you feel bad i feel sick nicotene high i cant stand real high i'd never be able to handle getting addicted is not an option i decide never again Current Mood: loved |
freewriters
[ evangelion_100 ]
|
8:00p |
A Priori
Rusty survival breathes heavily and throws up its hands in capitulation while needs give way to endless wants (reason seems to be almost extinct, bleeding in the streets and on the freeways burning with effervescence over its suffering) I try to think back to when we were young and knew that the world was ours and the night was a sanctuary that could not be desecrated by anything we said or did but it seems so meaningless now, with the light of years illuminating it seems anything but sacrosanct So dig beneath your thoughts, beneath your heart, and find some new diamond to glitter in imitation of your Sun (another distraction for your lonely eyes) |
freewriters
[ evangelion_100 ]
|
7:08p |
Dig
In this frozen river of melancholy I mend another broken bone and send another loose thought home I bend myself only to break It feels like I've been asleep for too many months of this year letting my eyes be pulled shut by heavy thoughts and tired inadequacies (I'm perpetually reluctant, constantly swept away by the force of my own desire) isolation dissolves every word I spoke, still I hunger for something more than what I have found but all I seem to see in the innumerable faces is echoes and shame, hidden as best they can Yet, I cannot believe this I find in you something substantial and concrete something that doesn't end (you gracefully bend towards then away from me like a tree in the fickle wind) you are beautifully imperfect and I don't know what to do with you there is reason to stand tall and reason to fall to the earth in tomorrow we'll carry on to a way out and bury what we're worth (bury it beneath the weight of our own inadequacies) |
freewriters
[ s3ld0n ]
|
7:25p |
pro-dualist confrontation
You don't know me! Hey! You don't know me! Who do you think you are? Are you me? Do you think you know me? You think you know me? You know me? You don't know me! I am he as you are he? As you are me? You are me? You think you are me? You? Me? You think you know me? You don't know me! Hey! You!
I am me. I am me!
You are not. |
freewriters
[ ange_de_vin ]
|
2:00p |
Capture paradise, I am gone in the swelling of your spawn. Singing anthems, kiss goodbye; hide the pain we have inside. Catching whispers, leave me be. I'm keeping lies I want you to see. Drag me down and watch me fall; I'll ignore the final call. Keep me tied, and remember me for everything I wished to be. Current Music: What Lies Beneath by Breaking Benjamin |
freewriters
[ ange_de_vin ]
|
1:41p |
In my own little world; warm with whiskey, raped by rum, shivering succulence, so distant, so near to those present in my eyes. It feels good to fall in, fall out, look out the window of peace and never have to move a curtain. Hindered view, perfect sight to a presence only buzzed. Current Music: 21 Guns - Green Day |
freewriters
[ ange_de_vin ]
|
1:10p |
In the early hours of morning, and the latest time of night, I see the fireflies fighting over which gives better light. I smell the moon at harvest, and taste the creeping sun; the safety in these little things says I'm the only one. Captured blades of moistened grass, drinking drops of dews; even in sunlight, I see the stars twinkling in my view. Peaceful hours of calm before the fireflies take flight; orange skies or endless blue, they bless my day or night. Current Music: Fireflies - Owl City |
freewriters
[ your_efling ]
|
6:07a |
This could well be some illegal vibe, Hearing you still calling out my name. And while it too could dissolve as easily as your fickle love, I’m gonna ride this thing out. You’ve still got my residue in your safe place, From when I slithered away to keep you asleep. Your anthology lies beside my pillow. I still remember your side of my bed. You wonder now whose lips I’m dividing. Medicated and moist. Out of sight but not mind. You start to stir so restlessly, knowing I’m making someone else smile. Like you, I’ve learned to love someone else. A buoy bobs up and down on the surface of the ocean. I can hardly see the coast tonight. I would never have guessed this shoal would swim my way. I could take my pick from all this variety. A washed up sandcastle can still be rebuilt. Someday I’ll forget how you’re plagued by guilt. I can’t even see the footprints from the night you bailed. Don’t wait up baby, this ship has sailed. |
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